I have written some pretty serious blogs lately, lol. I think its time I try, at least to the best of my ability as I am not blessed in the slap stick comedy department, lighten the mood 😀 lol. So, I have made a list of top 10 things I could live without. Really, there are probably hundreds of things I could live without, but here are some off the top of my head, that I really could do without and my life may actually be better without them 😉 LOL.
1. MOSQUITOS!!! OH.MY. GOSH. I seriously HATE these things. I am sure there is a reason the Good Lord made them, but I seriously have a hard time knowing what that reason could possibly be! When I die, I intend on asking Him about it. I sure hope these little boogers are not in heaven, though in heaven would they feed on your blood like mini blood thirsty vampires? HMM…. And it doesn’t seem to matter WHAT I wear, WHAT I spray on or don’t spray on, I end up getting eaten alive within 2 seconds of walking outside. I swear the mosquitos in Baltimore are bigger, badder and leave worse welts. Maybe the mosquitos of the south had some southern hospitality and only took a nibble? But, I swell up the size of that girl from Willy Wonka! IT.IS. TERRIBLE. LOL.
2. Eye Bubbles: Yes. those nasty yellow looking bubbles that form over the whites of your eyes. I especially get them when I am around cats. They are no fun. They itch. They are just gross, and they make the already terrible vision even worse. Seriously. I have terrible vision. Without my contacts or glasses, I cannot see a foot in front of my face. In fact, even 6 inches in front is blurry. These eye bubbles take forever to go away, and I look like I have some deadly disease. People are always saying. UHHH you have something in your eye! OMG WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR EYE!!! or wow your eye looks really gross, are you ok? LOL.
3. Diaper Poop Explosions, which usually leads to getting poop on yourself, then gagging and doing your best not to throw up the lunch you finally got around to eating…I think this picture pretty much sums it up. No words are really necessary…. LOL. EWW. Oh, sorry if this photo made you barf up your lunch….
4. Allergies and Sinue issues! OMGGGGG my life would be so much better without these. I could run through a field of daises twirling and singing “the hills are alive”, like Maria, without feeling like my throat is going to swell shut, I may actually blow my brains out through my nose, all the water in my body leaking through my eyes, and my eyes are so red I look like a crazed vampire going through blood withdrawal…. In fact, as I write this blog I am doped up on Advil sinus meds and I am still sneezing so much snot sprays out. Gross. I know. I told you I could do without them! Agree? Can I get a “A-CHOO?” LOL
5. Toddlers/Preschoolers (and I am sure it is something that won’t 100% EVER go away haha) repeating themselves 689589252898591 times in a row. YUP. This one is pretty self explanatory 😉 haha – Good things my girls are still the cutest things ever, or it may actually drive me to insanity. “Mommy? can I have an apple? can I have an apple mommy? MOMMYYYYYYYYY APPLE!? mommy?mommy?mommy?” – even when you answer, I think its hard wired for them to continue asking until the thought leaves there mind. Hmm wonder what people would do if I walked around repeating until a thought left my mind. Pretty sure people would think I flew out the cuckoo’s nest…LOL
7. THESE THINGS. I threw up in a mouth a little just looking at it. EWW. I think its a silver fish? GAG GAG PUKE.
8. Sleep paralysis! you know that wierd thing when you wake up, but can’t move and you feel like someone is sitting on you. OMG its so scary. I just wanna shout to my arms and legs. MOVE!!! MOVE!!! COME ON AND MOVE DANGIT!!!!!! I wonder what causes that? Aliens getting into your brain!? or worse!? probing you so they can track your movments!? YIKES. ok I now officially creeped myself out. Maybe I will just force myself to stay awake, just in case…. thats what coffee is for right? 5 hour energy?
Yes, I wrote clowns twice. I hate them that much. LOL. Ok, those are some things I could live without, what about you?